Being Normal

Have you had yours today?

Printing fun

Some of my slipper prints after playing with them on computers...


Pop art style

Baby slippers

Slip on slippers

Crazy Slippers

wrapping paper design? (minus the writing)

Teddy slips

warm and comfy

Slippers in space

Ballerina pattern

and finally...

A reminder not to wear my slippers to college

Little Slippers

It's been an exciting weekend for Neddy ...

My knitting skills don't stretch much further than holy scarves that end three times wider than they started, and Neddy is teeny weeny...

But....With thanks to Mamma G, Ned has a brand new pair of slippers.... and also a little rucksack to put his pen and sketchbook in for college.

What a lucky little bear! Thanks for being my friend :)

And thank you so much Mamma G!

Hope to make some nice drawings from these..!

What next?

A yummy collection of slippers...

I think someone is missing something ??

Hmmmmm.

Positive Changes

The Joys of Art School....

So, I have officially been reunited with The Real World since sept 2012. By The Real World I mean away from like-minded nutters at The Funny Farm, and into a classroom of like-minded creative nutters.

I freakin love art school. It has definitely, undoubtedly, been the most positive thing to help me grow, and for my wellbeing. ...
Studying, learning, being part of society, and best of all getting to do lots of crazy art attacks!

Ive even surprised myself by getting top notch grades. Ive come such a long way and I am really proud of myself :-)

Before college I wasnt working towards anything, I didnt have anything to get up for. I survived by doing a bit of art and writing, but didnt know what to draw or write, and would just end up scribbling out my complicated head....
I got so stuck in my head.

I was under CMHT for so long that you get institutionalised and you are surrounded by people who are poorly, and you end up more poorly because you have nothing else to think about and forget what life can be like outside of illness.

Life is soooo much a million times better outside. For the first time in a long time, Im actually doing life! spent waaaay too long avoiding the issue..

The social side of things has probably been the hardest. It's taken me a while to feel comfortable around people, but now I'm settled and have made a few good friends.

Doing my art is like breathing...its what keeps me real. I dont know if it keeps me grounded, but it definitely keeps me real. My projects give me new ideas to focus on instead of being stuck in my weird head. It gives me somewhere to unravel the confusion, somewhere to escape to, and a place to express myself freely. I absorb myself in my work, and am learning so much all the time.

I love having the routine, and dont really know what to do with myself when Im not there. It tires me out, so I should probably rest... but its too exciting, all these new art ideas, so I sleep a bit and do the necessary things to keep on top of life,and then I do lots and lots and lots of work.

I probably do too much work...
Though it isnt really work....there's nothing else I want to be doing. I need to do it, i loves it.

Just need to be careful not to overdo it.... One step at a time..... though I am impatient and that can take too long.

Doing my art is helping me to get to grips with things. And although I desperately wanted not to be reminded of anything to do with mental illness, it seems that there is always someone who needs a hand. Everybody has issues. Everybody struggles. And there is no such thing as normal.

Art school is my haven. It is where I am supposed to be. I feel so lucky to be studying at such a lovely place, to be having such a good education in my favourite thing, and to be surrounded by so many creative people. I also feel soooo lucky to finally have the strength and the brain-togetherness and the confidence to just go for it.
Though it wasnt really down to luck, but a lot of hope and effort... a lot of hard work that had to come from me.

I really believe that if you believe in yourself, and always try your best, then you can achieve the things you wanted to, no matter what life throws at you.

Scribbly Scrawlings

Ive been a right busybee in my sketchbook this weekend....doodling, my favourite way to spend a Sunday in me slips :)

Ive been looking at the book 'Picturing and Poeting' by Alan Fletcher.
This book is amazing!
It turns word into pictures, finds poetry in rubbish, and discovers the unlikely in the commonplace. That's what it says on the front.

It also gives little helpful hints for succeeding in life, such as this:

" You are obliged to go off on a tangent if you want to stop going round in circles."

I like this quote, it chills me out to know that its OK to have a lot of tangents, because that is better than getting dizzy.

How I loves to write and scribble!  I tried out a few pens and put them on automatic and just started drawing out my brains. Writing is drawing is writing is drawing....

I made up some pictures of slippers from my scrawlings. I made some slippers out of writing 'Slippers are warm and comfy'

It looks like a page of just scribblys but I find it quite pleasing. The act of writing non stop in tune with your thinking is so freeing. Writing is the mind tracing out messages, thoughts and feelings.
You cant read the writing, you can only make out a few words. It looks busy and noisy which is an exact image of how the inside of my brains must look.

Writing is you, on a page.

These images below are made up of lots and lots of writing. Each comment is hand-written, one on top of the other. Although, metaphorically, they are all talking at once, the noisy result is an artistic comment in itself.

Today's squiggles and scribbles... 

Promotional poster idea for my traditional fountain pen,

write your worries away...

An illustration of my thought train....CHOO CHOO!

Also, Thanks for the slippers I've received so far, keep sending in your pics!

At the end of the day,

the end of the day

is at the end of the day.

Be Warm

Show me your Slippers

If you appreciate the joy of wearing slippers, Here is an opportunity to partake in my arty project. I need more slippers.

Please take a photo of your slippers, and email your pics to
Laurakate1991@hotmail.co.uk

Also, If you wish, please share the following information

1. Your name, age
2.Describe yourself in 3 words
3. Something you like to do in your slippers (nothing rude please!)

For example
Here is a picture of my slippers...

Laura, 21
Caring, fun, discombobulated
I like to paint in my slippers

I'm planning on getting lots of pictures of slippers that I can then use to edit, draw from, make prints from, and then who knows ?

I was thinking of making some coasters to put your tea on, or postcards, or stamps from the images.

Or a game where you have to guess which slippers belongs to who.

Here is a nice little montage from some computer editing of my slippers.

Slippers are so lush.

Thought Trains

Post, Promote or Package?
~The Home~

TOO MANY THOUGHTS
Will drive you
Insane...
they make a thought train
that choo choos
Chews
Right through your brain..

Project ideas,
Rambling thoughts
Steaming away;
They dont make much sense
The train is immense
So just writing them out
To make me less tense...

See
The problem is now
Is where do I start?
There are too many things
I want to capture in art!

Having done a few
Mind mega maps
To give my brain fuel
And a trip off to poole
I have some project ideas
That could be pretty cool...

I was thinking of slippers
And putting them on stamps
So you could stick them
on an envelope,
And send it to your Gramps...

Slippers, flippers?
Shoes in general.
I could draw them
Or design them
Or take pictures
Of a few,
I could make some
In miniature
And package those up too

Sticking with slippers,
And being cosy at home...
How my home
is my home
When im safe
alone
And in my slippers...
Maybe with a cup of tea
And
it used to be
Furry Bernie
But now its a pen
or a sketchbook
Beside me.

My slippers are warm
And they go best
With tea,
Because tea is also
Warm.

Then i thought a lot
About warmth
And comfort
And peace
And how good it feels
To have sweet release.
Peace.

So i was thinking of peace
And peace in the home
And what makes a home
Your very own
Sanctuary.

A home
is where You're comfy
and safe
You can make it
Your very own
Personal space,
To your own unique taste
And just let yourself
Be
in your happy place.

So i thought about
Being...
And just
Being
Here
Now.

And how im so
Thankful
In this moment
To be free
in this way,
To have such a lovely home
To be me in
today...
And how it feels good
To be more at ease
Because ive stepped off the train
And remembered
To
Breathe.

So for a moment
I do
Just breathe
in...
...and...
out....
And the thoughts
do not shout
But just
drift away
In
the thought stream,
And i am totally
Sitting on the bank,
Out.

And everything
Is
Calm.

But
Like i said,
only for
A moment.
Before
CHOO CHOO
Oh
here we go!
Its back!
The thought train
Chewing
On its track...

So i hop right on
And get whisked away
Slippers? Homes?
Things in homes
That make it your own:
Furniture, photos
Collections
Toys, stickers..
The urge to collect
Random stuff?

Sticking with
Stickers,
I mean slippers...
Warm.
Peace.
Being here today?
The Now...
And Now.
Not stressing
Being calm...

I should make
A poster
To put on my wall
That i can see
At all times
It should say
Just stop
And just breathe.
And write it down.
Or draw...

Write, draw
Make it the law.

Now this
Is
Getting silly.

I could promote
The Now
But How?
Be calm
Have a cup of tea,
Chill
Pick up a pen
Doodle
In your slippers

Hmm

I think
I think
Too much
And I think
I might just
Go
with the original
Slippers theme.

Poole Museum

We had lots of fun in the 1950s kitchen at Poole Museum. It was fun to play!

Ian made a lovely housewife...

Maps of the Mind

Mind maps are so crazy and mind mappy that they expand your brain and make it hurt a little bit, in an exciting sort of stretchy way.

The best one i ever did yet was on 'balance' where i was scribbly map minding all night in my small scrawly writing on a big piece of paper, until there was no space and i got to the edges and i literally had no more shouting blah blah left in my head... I covered the purpose of life, death, life after death, space, aliens, the universe spirits gods the apocalypse and everything...

But enough about that.. Today We expanded our minds and explored ideas for the new proj through a group mind map bonanza...
Here's our minds explosion...

Gotta say, our little group tooootally did the best thinkaling.... we wrote down everything that came into our heads about 'the home' and then every thing off that map has its own little mind map, and all of our minds together were like one giant mind mapping out a map of Amaaazing artistic possibilities. Yum.

now I just have too many IDEAS to start from...
I have whittled down to the following to explore:

Slippers
Tea bags
Things people collect
My pen
Toys
Shiny things

I may do some more mindmegamapping just because it is fun and I like to see where you might end up. Ahh The possibilities ...

School Trip :-)

Today at colegio we are going on an adventure to Poole museum. At least i think that's where we are going.

It's early and i've been awake for a while since still get a bit twitchy when its a change of routine and the fear of the unknown, etc...

Mahhhhh.

Last time we went to Poole i drew the harbour and the houses from the balcony at poole museum, and Neddy and I went on the train so we drew the railway track...

Looking foreward to lots more drawing today.

Dont really understand the new project... I've had a whole weekend and normally would have made a cracking start by now, but this is the first breif that has got me a wee bit confused.

We're doing graphic design, and conputers. I'm loads better on the computer now but it still confuses me, especially photoshop, which gets me all discombobulated. I like using my ipad, its so much more simples. (meetkats).

The title of our project is 'post, promote or package'... I get that bit. Think I'm going to do promote, so make a poster or something.

The little mini title is 'The History of the Home'... Thats the bit I dont get. How do you promote something to do with the history of the home?

I've done a little mind map... So far I'm thinking along the lines of things people collect, or i was thinking of promoting a pen, because i have one of those in my home, and I kinda like it.

Any suggestions?

i have been flicking through a little book i got out the library, called 'The meaning of Home'... Possibly not relevant and you shouldn't judge a book by its cover but I totally do, and this one was cute..

Its a little bit jabberwocky. But it says something about the idea that our lives can be 'read' through our homes, through their decoration, design and contents... That might be something I can roll with.

I always worry that I go totally off the point of the point of the project. maybe I should just look at the invention of the toilet or the development of kitchens or something?. Or ooh i could do electricity? The light bulb? How do you draw electricity? Hmmmmm.

i gots to go, bye.

Oh Neddy

He really does like to sneak his way in there... Cheeky! .

Neddy

I don't know if I ever introduced you all to my little friend. This is Neddy.
Neddy the teddy .

Neddy is a little teeny tiny bear, who I found in the mud at the funny farm during a particularly terrible moment.

I was crying so much that I couldn't breathe, and there he was just holding out his paw to me from the soil and geese poo.

His little face looked so sad that I cried even more..
And then

I picked him up, and dedicated the next hour or so to giving him a bath, wrapping him in a paper towel and singing him a song.

Now he lives in my pocket and secretly hides there at all times. When I'm at college and get a little anxious / twitchy / weird , I stroke Neddys little head and he reminds me to breathe. And i count to 10. And he is magic because he always makes me feel back to norms.

He is so sweet and small that nobody even knows he is hiding there apart from me. He's such a good little guy.

I think I may have mentioned before that breathing is is the fundamental thing for staying well .

The dangers of not breathing include...

1. Voice coming out all squeaky
2. Hyperventilation
3. Loss of consciousness
4. Lack of oxygen to the brain (detrimental to coherent thinking)
5. death

Neddy has snuck his way into a few of my art projects, and he also likes going to art school.

Life Drawing

Okay, I thought I'd start off with sharing a few life drawings with you...

Life drawing is the thing that makes me feel like a real proper actual art student. Everyone has their easels and uses squinty eyes to measure people's ding dongs with their pencils.

At first I was like teehee ha ahem, that person is nakedamondo, awkward?? But after a while you forget that they are indecent and just start drawing what you see. Besides, everyone is naked under their clothes. I have learned to appreciate the human body in all its naked glory.

I sometimes worry that they might be cold, as it can be a bit breezy.

We've had some interesting models... There was the man who reminded me of someone out of Lord of the Rings, who came up with some imaginative poses which he explained were inspired by his cat....
There was the man with the ginormous ding dong (knee length) which I just drew his head and shoulders and a big triangle to avoid having to face his hoo haar, and the lady who was so cute and tiny, with the pertest breasts I have ever seen. They were practically pointing to the ceiling. Damn that woman .

So here are a few drawings from the lady model. I found her more interesting to draw than the willys, though I didn't really do her justice in my pictures.

Bon Jour

Hello World,

This is my first post in my new blog.

My last blog, 'In Laura's Locket' , has come to its natural unfinished conclusion. I am no longer able to document my life as a crazy cat lady aged 20, due to no longer having my adorable Bernie., and I am now aged 21, catless, and inviting a new era of my life to unfold.

I am now an Art Student! Things Have come a long way and it is so good to be back in the real world. I'm fairly busy these days doing lots of arting and studying, but I miss blogging and feel it is time for some more blogging fun.

Reading back through Laura's Locket is strange... I know how awful I was feeling and yet it is so funny!! Writing my blog was my escape, and helped me to step out of myself and make a joke of a pretty bad situation. Writing cheers me right up :-) I'd like to continue on these humourous endeavours, it is definitely good for the soul.

I've worked really hard in the last year or so to pull myself together.  I told myself its mind over matter..... This is not always true of course, like when my thoughts are so loud its like voices in my head and i feel like my brains might burst..but  its important to keep a positive attitude. and I dont get those weird brain malfunctions so much these days, hurrah!

I have realised through my experiences, and am continuing to learn, that I am strong....Still need to toughen up a bit, but inside I am strong. I used to think my illness was a sign of great weakness...in fact, it has made me the person I am today. It has made me more openminded and empathetic, more in tune with other people and understanding. It has teased the creativity out of me which allowed me to open up and spread my wings.

I like to write to get any blurry thoughts out of my head, to humour others and hopefully to inspire anyone who is suffering with the same sort of thing. This can be a place for me to share my artwork too...

My life has turned a corner, and I'm steering the ship. Things are exciting and Im looking up up up.We all have the power within us to make something of ourselves, no matter what life throws at us. That's what I believe.

I can't wait to start blogging again, and cant wait for what life has in store? i hope you enjoy reading as much as I am going to enjoy writing.

Shalom

Lau xx

The Past

For my previous blog and past tales of craziness, cat ladyness and Funny Farming, click on this link

www.inlauraslocket.blogspot.co.uk